It Takes The Time That It Takes

I've been thinking about our culture and the trend to want/expect instant gratification. One of my personal struggles is switching gears & slowing down from the pace of the corporate working world to something more "zen". The corporate world wants me to act with decisiveness and calculated precision, meeting aggressive deadlines and getting the job done right the first time.

And it's not just my job, it's everything in our society that is just full of quick fixes, drive through windows, fast food, & high speed Internet connections. Most of us can't even wait until we get home to use a telephone, so we have cells to call our friends & loved ones while driving or shopping or whatever we are doing. Email isn't even fast enough any longer, and instant messaging on a computer is being nudge out quickly by cell phones used for text messaging. I won't even go into the idea of multi tasking, that is so contrary to what we need to effectively interact with our animals.

At the end of my work day, I shift into the gear that interacts with animals and all of that lightning quick drive to complete a task needs to slow... no, I take that back, it needs to STOP.

The reason for the shift in my own mindset is just because training an animal takes the time that it takes. The problem is that sometimes its just so hard to switch off that momentum stop rushing around. The "rush" feels so normal, after all, it's what I do most of the day. If only I had a switch I could flip to turn it all off.

I don't think this is an isolated issue for those of us who have jobs in corporate America. I think it's more universal than that. We are all so scheduled, kids have to get to school, or after school activities, lessons, appointments, practices for various sports. For adults, so many of us also have some lessons or hobbies we are trying to squeeze in between fixing the next meal, or cleaning some part of the house that has been long ignored.

So, enough about how busy we all are and our sometimes frantic feeling rush from one task to the next, and our expectations that everything move at that same pace.

For horses, it takes as long as it takes because they can't really modify their behavior AND keep a relaxed mental state if they are worried. If they feel rushed, they will worry because when a predator attacks, he is literally rushing them. Science has proven that the higher the anxiety level, the less able they are to learn on an intricate level. They can learn gross concepts, like an object is scary (not a lesson most of us want our horses to learn) but they don't grasp the fine tuned concepts, like a nice energetic but relaxed half pass or piaffe.

What matters isn't just the behavior, they have to be relaxed and happy mentally while doing the requested behavior, or the performance will be marred by unhappy expressions, swishing tails and reluctance on some level.

The catch is that relaxation and the "zen" mental state needs to start with the human, not the horse. As an example, about a month ago, I started playing with trailer loading with a few youngsters. Believe me, this was long overdue, but life got in the way of their planned education. I promised my horses I would let them tell me when they were ready to move to the next step, and I would not force the issue... I would not be tempted by the popular NH idea of making it pleasant inside the trailer and unpleasant outside the trailer. I would not make them choose what they prefer, but rather let them choose when they were ready.

My filly was very concerned about this trailer loading idea. She has always been more sensitive than the boys and she was worried enough that for some days she would just put her front feet up on the ramp and stop. She let me know that she wasn't comfortable putting her head too far inside that trailer because of how the trailer blocked her vision. I reminded myself she would walk in when she was ready, and this was her schedule, not mine.

Ultimately the breakthrough came and she just walked in but she was clearly frightened by being in a box with sides and a roof. She stood in the straight stall, sharing the space with me, breathing hard and looking at the "stuff" in the front compartment. She was so tense she couldn't even take a treat from my hand, but just stood their wide eyed and clearly not at all confident. I let her back out when she choose to and she walked on 2 more times, worried but not enough to stop her from going on.

I got distracted and trailer loading went on the back burner for some weeks. Yesterday, the trailer was hitched anyway and it seemed like a good thing to revisit. I was sure the filly would only walk in about half way and stop and I felt that was OK if that's the best she could offer. Instead, she just walked on, all the way inside with no hesitation, looking curious but not frightened. We repeated this exercise a few more times, and I rubbed her wither, back and haunches and she stood quietly and without fear.

What she needed was time. She reminded me that by letting her take the time she needed, she's happy about getting on and has no fears connected with the idea of very limited vision on the inside of the trailer.

I know if my experiment was evaluated by any of the NH trainers, I would be considered a total failure for taking so long to get her loaded. They tend to take such pride in fixing issues fast. Yes, many trainers could have loaded her more quickly, but my priority is relaxation and calm. I feel it's unacceptable for her to be frightened, high headed, feeling the need to escape. Just the process of introducing something so new was stress enough, I didn't want to add more. So, I'll stick with taking the time that it takes.